Monday, March 2, 2009

Frozen Monkey Heads & Other Fun Stuff

I saw this story today and thought it would be a fun link to share with our readers. Among the usual pocket knives, lotions and bottles of water, our officers often find some, well… not so usual things.

Check out this Daily News article on the weird and wacky stuff that’s found during searches by TSA and Customs at JFK.

I encourage any of our officers that are reading to chime in and talk about some of the out of the ordinary things you’ve found.

Blogger Bob

EoS Blog Team

81 comments:

RB said...

Fron the article Bob referenced.


Need to cut down a tree on vacation?

You still need to read those pesky TSA rules.

Wouldn't it be nice to be able to read those pesky TSA rules?

TSO #2 said...

Guiter Hero Controller
Rice Cooker
Fish
Cat (Yes I have seen a cat once, & it wasn't the one on TV)
30 lbs of Meat/ Steak.
Wine
Scuba Gear
Wine bottle pepper shaker made of wood
Adult toys (Like the cat very RARE)
Crosses
Bird Cages
Grills
Golf Clubs

Anonymous said...

TSO #2 and Bob, please explain how a frozen monkey head or any items on TSO #2's list are a threat to aviation. Golf clubs don't count - an equivalent would be to steal a broom from a janitor.

Mr. Gel-pack said...

A Macbook air?

A rubber band ball?

A gel pack?

Or anything else unexpected?

Anonymous said...

OMG! I can't believe some of the stuff you guys find.

TSO #2, your list doesn't even compare to the news article and teh things you listed aren't odd. Did you read the story? I guess a grill is a strange thing to bring on a plane, but everything else on your list look normal.

A dead person in a wheelchair is so crazy!!!!!!!!!!!

TSO Tom said...

I found two very large rocks under the cusion of a passenger who attempted to come in through the wheel chair lane (we were using the exit at the time). The passenger had previously come through the checkpoint, gone back out to "smoke" come back through the checkpoint, gone back out again, then come through the exit in a wheel chair to be screened as a PWD. He was physically sitting on the rocks!

Ronnie said...

Annon, I think the point of this post is to just take a break from the heavy stuff and have a little bit of fun.

Wierdest thing I saw was a full-sized bust of a singing Elvis Presly.

Ronnie, TSO DEN

philr said...

TSO #2 needs to get out more if he thinks wine, crosses and golf clubs constitute a wacky carry-on.

Jannis said...

Anonymous said...
TSO #2 and Bob, please explain how a frozen monkey head or any items on TSO #2's list are a threat to aviation.


Try reading the article. This post has nothing to do with aviation security. Loosen up a bit, this post is just about having a little fun and the funny things that people try to take on the plane with them.

NoClu said...

I've seen grandma's attempting to put an oversized carry-on into the overhead bin, bowling balls, babies who've thrown up on themselves, a POS who had apparently pooped herself, and a variety of drunken people.

Few if any posed a threat to aviation. While these folks may be funny, amusing, stupid or otherwise worthy of comment, they have little to do with security.

I've seen/heard of TSA "officers" who have fallen asleep on duty, make up rules, confiscate items that were proven harmless but perceived as a threat, rude, impatient, aggressive, thieves, carrying concealed weapons, and unable to identify more than 65% of "simulated explosive devices or components" introduced to the secure environment by the DHS/TSA Red Team.

All of these, while amusing, tragic or infuriating, are a threat to aviation security.

HSVTSO Dean said...

Y'know, six and a half years doing this, and I can't really say I've come across anything truly 'weird.'

Mhm.

Probably the most unusual thing we've ever found was a lawn mower. A full-sized push power with the handle detached, folded up tight into an enormous bag to be checked because the guy didn't want to pay for shipping costs.

But even that's not really all that unusual. We're just boring in HSV.

...A... uh... a kitchen sink? :D We did have one of those come through the checkpoint some years back. At the very least, now whenever someone says, "So, I bet you guys see all sorts of stuff. People just come through with everything but the kitchen sink."

(which is, actually, a fairly common conversation to have with passengers in passing at HSV. We have a laid-back, friendly way about us here~)

...I can respond with, "No, no, they bring those, too."

Okay, so it's certainly not a frozen monkey or a dead Chilean in a wheelchair. Did my best, though. -.-

TSO #2 said...

To all:

On the X-ray they look weird or odd. In real life or physically they aren't.

To Anon: Not saying its a threat, far from that just some interesting things or fun things like the topic states thats all.

RB said...

NoClu said in part.....

I've seen/heard of TSA "officers" who have fallen asleep on duty, make up rules, confiscate items that were proven harmless but perceived as a threat, rude, impatient, aggressive, thieves, carrying concealed weapons, and unable to identify more than 65% of "simulated explosive devices or components" introduced to the secure environment by the DHS/TSA Red Team.

All of these, while amusing, tragic or infuriating, are a threat to aviation security.

March 3, 2009 10:40 AM


These topics really deserve an article.

Of course we all know that TSA will not address real problems like these. It's far easier to brag about the "Big Catch" stuff.

Anonymous said...

RB said
These topics really deserve an article.

Of course we all know that TSA will not address real problems like these. It's far easier to brag about the "Big Catch" stuff.

March 3, 2009 1:43 PM
___________________________________

RB are you always the downer at a party. I bet you don't even get invited to parties. I know I would not want to listen to your negativity all the time.

Anonymous said...

TSO #2 said...
Guiter Hero Controller
Rice Cooker
Fish
Cat (Yes I have seen a cat once, & it wasn't the one on TV)
30 lbs of Meat/ Steak.
Wine
Scuba Gear
Wine bottle pepper shaker made of wood
Adult toys (Like the cat very RARE)
Crosses
Bird Cages
Grills
Golf Clubs
___________________________________

Is this a list of things that you have found? Because most of it is not a big deal. Not too sure why you waisted your time posting this.

RB said...

RB are you always the downer at a party. I bet you don't even get invited to parties. I know I would not want to listen to your negativity all the time.

March 3, 2009 2:15 PM
.......................
We expect all contributors to be respectful. We will not post comments that contain personal attacks of any kind;
..........................
Personal attack aside, (thanks moderators for enforcing your rules) I'm actually a very positive upbeat person.

I am positive that I can bring favorable change to TSA and will continue to voice my opinions and thoughts about what is posted here and elsewhere.

In fact I can point to two things that have been disclosed or changed from my and others actions.

One was disclosure of the directive that requires TSO's to report large sums of cash, also know as contraband at the TSA.

Second was the changes from 3.0 to 3.4 oz on this blog and the TSA.GOV website. I'm still working on the signage and verbal messages at airports but I think I will prevail in that also.

TSA is ripe for corrective action and I am happy to lend a hand on making those corrections come about.

Now Anon, tell me how you have helped TSA recently?

Anonymous said...

I love it when I'm on x-ray and something unusual (non dangerous) comes through. My favorite was a large (about 1 foot') ceramic spider. I looked up at the amused passenger and asked in a mockingly serious tone, "Maam, did you put a spider in my x-ray?" I showed her the image (the monitior pivoted) and it was very amusing! That kinda stuff breaks up a day! TSO-Joe

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the puppy post.

Eric
One of the 5 or 6

txrus said...

Try bringing a cooler full of bone marrow (for a transplant) thru a checkpoint & watch screeners come running from every corner of the terminal so they can look (a few even wanted to touch, which is a no no)...

NoClu said...

Can someone please post, state, or link to the official TSA policy on children (anyone under 18) and the MMW (aka Strip Search Machines) process?

I don't want to subject myself to this process, and I don't want my daughter exposed in this way either.

GSOLTSO said...

We found the mower (with a full load of fuel), a weedeater (also with a full load of fuel), powdered bull semen (not sure what that was for), tons of things you would not think would be on a plane. The worst we found was a human finger, packed in formaldehyde (i think it was formaldehyde), the guy lost his finger in a mower accident and was taking it home to put on his mantel. That had a bit of a stir going for abit until he showed up and explained it was HIS finger. The frozen monkey thing would be intriguing, sad and scary but intriguing...

TSO said...

Various adult toys (one woman sold them and was anxious to explain the virtues of each one!)

An entire box of used condoms (guy wanted to be a wise ---)

Big rocks (I'm talkin the size of bowling balls)

30 or more loose Bic lighters all shoved into a purse.

Parts of a fence.

Just about any part of a car you could imagine.

Gasoline powered leaf blower - with a tank of gas.

All kinds of frozen and semi frozen and defrosted and leaking meats.

Prosthetic limbs (had one pilot who used to take his leg off as he got to the xray machine and send it through - said it was easier than going through the pat down & wanding) - used to really wake up the new xray operators!

Puppies and kitties through x-ray because passengers are in thier own worlds. One lady even tried to put a baby through.

TSO Rachel said...

The strangest things I've seen... well, it may not be strange, but it's gross: containers of urine, and containers of spit (after chewing tobacco). Quite disgusting, really.


We did have a container filled with live crabs in checked baggage- the owner of this container did not tell us, and when it came off of the belt, it tipped over and fell open. There were crabs running EVERYWHERE.

Bubba said...

No Clu said: "Can someone please post, state, or link to the official TSA policy on children (anyone under 18) and the MMW (aka Strip Search Machines) process?"

And please explain what the policy is for small children when MMW is used as a primary screening tool. Are all small children patted down??

RB said...

While we are all having fun with the odd things brought to airports I feel it is time to refocus on some real issues that TSA has created.

1, Gate checks on an increase.

Why? Does TSA do such a poor job at checkpoints that they have little confidence in the security provided that gate checks are needed? I can see no other reason.

2, Millimeter Wave Whole Body Imager "Strip Search Machines".

To have some unknown TSA dweeb viewing my naked body is an affront to my mores and privacy. So my only option is to be felt up by another TSA dweeb. These options are not acceptable!

I call on everyone to complain loudly and often to your elected officials, better yet let the airlines know that you will use all other means to travel when possible until this invasive strip search is banned from this nations airports.

TSA has systematically implemented policies against personal freedom; Forced ID Checks, No Fly lists that are near impossible to challenge or even to find out if your name is on the list, and now Strip Searches just so one can go on vacation or business travel to name a few.

What TSA has not done is to find one single real threat to this nations aviation transportation system.

What TSA has not done is to inspect all cargo that is placed on commercial passenger aircraft.

What TSA has not done is to screen all airport workers when they enter the secure areas of airports. This includes people like a gun toting Denver TSO and the honest TSO who stole a $50,000 video camera, among other items, from checked baggage.

What TSA has not done is to secure checked baggage and continues to enable thieves, TSA and others, with easy access allowing anyone of the not screened workers to place contraband or explosives in the luggage.

What TSA has allowed is for TSA employees to damage the very airplanes that some of us trust to safely carry our families and others to our destinations.

What TSA has done is to confiscate permitted items with no recourse to travelers and no penalties to poorly trained employees.

It is time for change at TSA.

Visible accountability of TSA employees to travelers is needed now!

A system of fines for TSA employees is needed for those who refuse or are unable to learn the secret rules.

A means of redress for travelers who feel they have been wronged at a checkpoint.

Preservation of confiscated property until appeals are exhausted.

Truthful, accurate information from TSA at all airports and other TSA information access points available to the public.

A list of rules that travelers must comply with when transversing a TSA "Dragnet" checkpoint.

Truth and Integrity.

Two words missing at TSA.

Patrick (BOS TSO) said...

*Car muffler and it's pipe in carry-on along with Nitrous oxide (N2O) regulators.

*Motorcycle seat and attachments in carry on which I dealt with earlier this week

*Various oddity electronic devices of sorts carried by engineers.

*Rocks of various sorts every once in a while

*Paintings

One I didn't handle but did witness was a water filter of some sort (certainly wasn't a Brita or PUR I've ever seen) that caused a bit of a stir because it liked a PVC pipe bomb, eventually it was cleared by the on-duty State Police EOD team.

I've also seen guys who have done PC mods turning their briefcase into a PC.
As seen here:
http://forums.guru3d.com/showthread.php?t=140290

Our lockers are in our oversize screening location, so I do occasionally weird things to be checked out of the normal assortment of golf clubs and skis.

Such as.....
*A cooler full of crabs... but I guess that's not that weird.

*Large HDTVs.. not that weird either

*A plastic 100-lb Stanley tool-chest which I helped push on to the belt... before we discovered it was too tall for the bag belt door which has a IR sensor, but it was still physically small enough to actually clear the belt ceiling. Eventually they sent it down on it's side to bypass the IR sensor.

*A shield, which I was being searched when I visited a bag room for a few minutes to grab something.

I'm not baggage certified, but I'm sure our bag room people see much more....

That's all I can come up with right now..
________________________

At least RB is telling us he wants TSA reformed... that made my day to be honest. :)

Not to be rude RB, but you are a bit of downer... sometimes, not all the time.

But hey, I guess it's just because of the side of the fence you're on.

You're a PAX and I'm a TSO. Sometimes it's an oil-water relationship.

Anonymous said...

Here at MSP we had a guy try to bring a cattle prod through once.

matthew thompson said...

Ive found three mobile phones in the rear pocket of seats upon sitting down. Handed them all in too. I would love to know if they actually make their way back to the owner.

Wish i found a RICE COOKER now though. just kidding.

Anonymous said...

"You're a PAX and I'm a TSO. Sometimes it's an oil-water relationship."

The proper term for the people you ostensibly serve is "citizen," not "pax." But thank you for reminding us that TSA is the enemy.

RB said...

At least RB is telling us he wants TSA reformed... that made my day to be honest. :)

Not to be rude RB, but you are a bit of downer... sometimes, not all the time.

But hey, I guess it's just because of the side of the fence you're on.

You're a PAX and I'm a TSO. Sometimes it's an oil-water relationship.

March 5, 2009 11:23 AM

.................
Why is the relationship between Travelers and TSA so strained?

Could it be that TSO's have treated travelers poorly?

TSO's enforce SOP incorrectly?

That passengers are held to a higher standard of conduct than TSO's?

That your agency could care less what travelers think about some policies implemented by TSA?

I could go on and on, but TSA sets the agenda, not travelers.

TSA has failed in its primary duties making air travel so unpleasant that many people refuse to travel by air.

Buying you guys fake cop outfits and metal badges was one of the most boneheaded moves ayone could make, but TSA leadership thought that was more important than developing information for travelers so they could know and understand the rules at the checkpoint.

If TSA continues down the same path it has been traveling I see no other outcome than failure.

Real change is needed at TSA, not play cop outfits!

Rebecca said...

I am glad you are there to catch these things. But I shudder to think I could be sharing a seat with someone transporting a frozen monkey head!

Anonymous said...

I work both checkpoint and baggage in Alaska, you want strange, I see strange every week. My personal favorites were a frozen thanksgiving turkey, 3 sea otter heads, a baseball bat lamp (that was a fun one), coolers full of lead fishing weights, one guy was even mad we wouldn't let him take his filleting knife because he wanted to finsih cleaning his catch on the plane and when the symphony comes through, full size bass that are worth more than I am. Baggage is a whole nother animal, I think my single favorite was a few small wind turbine that were going out to one of the villages to help cut down on their usage of diesal for their power.

The worst part is when the hardware has a really good sale around Christmas time. You start to see people trying to carry on tools of all shape and sorts from chain saws, to nail guns, to a 2 foot ice saw with 2 inch teeth. One of the things I hate to find though are Snow Globes, it wasn't so bad when you could check two bags cause the passenger could always go back and check the bag, but now thats likely to cost $25-50.

Anonymous said...

O yes! The hazards of the snow globe revisited. Why again are they a threat to aviation? Not.

kellymae81 said...

NoClu Said:Can someone please post, state, or link to the official TSA policy on children (anyone under 18) and the MMW (aka Strip Search Machines) process?

I don't want to subject myself to this process, and I don't want my daughter exposed in this way either.

March 4, 2009 9:59 AM

-----------------------------------
You don't have to...you can opt for the original metal detector option and pat down if necessary. We can in no way force you to the MMW.

SDF TSO

kellymae81 said...

I personally have not seen anything too weird, but I'll share something else. I work at Louisville Int. and so that brings a lot of celebs around the KY Derby. There is a huge lot that is just filled with personal jets, so most don't have to come thru security, but some do. I have met a couple in my 2 yrs and my co-workers have met many thru the years.

One for me was Wayne Newton. He was really a sweet and sincere man. I also met Kim Peek (the real rainman). I got to hold the oscar he received for inspiring the movie. I saw Anna Nicole Smith's daughter (too cute) and Larry come thru. I've met Muhammad Ali of course. And I think thats about it. Kind of neat to see who comes thru.

Bubba said...

" You don't have to...you can opt for the original metal detector option and pat down if necessary. We can in no way force you to the MMW. SDF TSO"

SDF TSO, is this a confirmation that all children too young to step into and stand in position in an MMW are submitted to pat downs where MMW is used as a primary screening tool?

Anonymous said...

I have had an entire stone fireplace(dismantled) come through with a diagram on how to reassemble it, lab chemicals that are used to strip DNA from cells(extremely dangerous, WILL cause cancer, MAY cause death DO NOT breathe, touch, smell, seek IMMEDIATE MEDICAL ATTENTION if comes in contact with skin). I think it took the airline a week to find someone to come pick it up for proper diposal. I also seen bleeding deer heads that people wanted to carry on, denied, bags filled with water plants, and frozen or stuffed animals that people planned to eat or stuff. I have also seen machine parts, gas engines and tires. I had a coworker find a zip lock bag filled with actually crap. I had another coworker get a brief scare when the unidentifed liquid spilled inside of a bag melted his gloves. My airport had a passenger attempt to carry a Egyptian bobcat mix aboard as a "pet." It laid his arm open from wrist to elbow in a bid for freedom. Thank God for the tranguilizer. It didn't get far before it collapsed. The airline refused to let it on the plane for safety issues.

And for people who weren't reading the article before complaining. CUSTOMS took some of the mentioned items. The other items mentioned are just weird things found during a search.

7 yr tso

Anonymous said...

"2, Millimeter Wave Whole Body Imager "Strip Search Machines".

To have some unknown TSA dweeb viewing my naked body is an affront to my mores and privacy. So my only option is to be felt up by another TSA dweeb. These options are not acceptable!"

To you, perhaps. Not to me. Anything that'll get me through security faster and safer is fine by me. Don't lump your morals in with everyone.

Anonymous said...

"You're a PAX and I'm a TSO. Sometimes it's an oil-water relationship."

The proper term for the people you ostensibly serve is "citizen," not "pax." But thank you for reminding us that TSA is the enemy.
___________________________________
PAX stands for passenger. "But thank you for reminding us that TSA is the enemy." That does not even make sense.
What makes people right such idiotic things, and why are they even posted.

Anonymous said...

To have some unknown TSA dweeb viewing my naked body is an affront to my mores and privacy. So my only option is to be felt up by another TSA dweeb. These options are not acceptable!"
__________________________________
"Dweeb" wow the intelligence!

TravelingTSO said...

Lets see, the two wierdest and also grossest things I've seen are:
1. A used feminine product, in a bag at the checkpoint, why the heck not just throw that nastiness away!!!

2. An unpreserved moose leg! This guy smuggled the moose leg over the Canadian border and was trying to fly home with it in his checked bag, wrapped up in a garbage bag. It wasn't even sealed and had leaked nastiness everywhere. Apparently, his six year old son found it on a river bank and thought it was SO COOL. When we opened the bag everyone within a 100 foot radius wanted to throw up. The entire front of our airport ended up smelling like dead animal for about 5 hours until we could get the proper authorities to come pick it up.

Movie Critic said...

Ha, I never had a monkey head. But I did try to take a tube of Monkey Snot hair gel through the airport. This was just after they instated the no liquid rule. I got that stuff in Mexico, it was the best gel I ever had, now I can never get it again!

Anonymous said...

Who's side is TSA really on?

They steal from us, endanger the public by damaging airplanes, and abuse travelers at checkpoints with secret rules.

Folks, if there is any truth to this story posted below then TSA is making a move to control access to all General Aviation Airports. Without any input from those impacted. No public comment, just a secret move to implement this Security Directive.
This plan will desimate many small airports.

Once again we have a secret TSA rule that those who are affected cannot read. How can anyone comply with secret rules?

This action is not the Free America I grew up in. In truth it smacks more like the country of North Korea.

I ask again, who's side is TSA really on?

TSA is truly a Clear and Present Danger to the United States of America!

It's time to sound off and make a lot of noise. Call your congressional representatives. Lock up the switch boards in Washington. Stop this now, and while your at it call for the disbandment of TSA. TSA is not about freedom, but control.


"Just while we're all fighting the LASP proposal, did you all know
that the TSA is scheduled to implement ANOTHER SD that they are
trying to slide in under the radar? This SD is not open for public
comment, and is being pushed through under the guise of "national
security".

It will affect ALL airports with Part 121 scheduled airline service,
but you all know what will happen next! Inquiries to NBAA, AOPA, EAA
etc. have been the same - they are aware, yet powerless to do anthing.

Here is my email I drafted last night after a meeting at the MTJ
airport with the local TSA reps. Get mad...do something because this
is not going away:
.......
read more at link ....

http://tinyurl.com/c7eb6w

TonyToneDeaf said...

Weird items I have found...
a personal plug in device for a specific cavity with a large amount of lubricant (it was huge).
A chainsaw, a baseball bat, two cowboy pistols that shoot blanks, a deer processing set (huge knife, bone saw etc.), a 60+ lbs bag full of porn dvd's with a huge bottle of lotion, bowling ball. I once had a lady who had 2 gallons of milk with 4 plastic cups, 2 jars of peanut butter with a box a crackers and a knife, who stated the milk was for her baby. I once had a lady who had 2 4 packs of redbull who said it was for her baby. A cat the lady stated that she was told to put the cat in the xray. A small dog, and I got in an argument with a lady who was going to let her 10 year old son crawl into the machine, he just wanted to see what was in the machine.

donnie said...

A few years ago we had 2 frozen, human heads packed in ice come through our baggage x-rays. That caused quite a stir and a lot of paperwork.

Other than that, just the occassional person who puts their pet through the x-ray, bags full of pornography, and international checked bags that are always a bit scary to attempt to go through.

Bobi said...

Haha, from where you find this funny stuffs :).

Anonymous said...

My first year with TSA had a lady who "forgot" to remove/takeoff a battery operated "novelty" device before she walked throught the metal detector. She didn't think it would alarm the MD. Its kinda sad how many people don't know batteries are metal.

7 yr tso

Anonymous said...

My first year with TSA had a man who "forgot" to remove/takeoff his wedding ring before she walked throught the metal detector. He didn't think it would alarm the MD. Its kinda sad how many people don't know rings are metal.

Non-tso

TSORon said...

Hmmm, lets see...
Adult toys, far more than once
50+ Bic lighters taped into a roll
25 knives (same passenger as with the lighters)
Knife hidden in a bottle of hand lotion (more than 3.4oz)
Shotgun shells
Magazines from several different firearms, in one case
Wedding cake
A prosthetic leg
Crow-Bar
A Quilt rack (HUGE!)

Not all, but just some of the weird or unusual

Michael said...

Decaying dead geese in checked luggage. Plenty of large adult toys... some of them bigger than my arm. Marmalades, sauces, etc...without caps, spilled everywhere. It's just interesting.

I don't think Patrick was implying we are the enemy when he referred to the TSO/ PAX relationship as an oil/water mixture. He was simply referring to the abuse some of us are subjected to from passengers time to time. I can understand your frustration with TSA, but people like Patrick from Boston and I (I would know, we work together) are NOT your enemies. We are simply doing our job as we were told. I am not a thief, never have been and never will be. The liquids rule has been in effect since 2006, and I have never had an issue differentiating between 3.0 oz and 3.4 oz, it's the 40 oz wine bottles that come through that get me. People often say to me, "oh, you're taking it? enjoy it then" ...... you should know better, plain and simple, whether the rule says 3 or 3.4. be honest with yourself.

do people honestly think that i am taking their wine bottle to consume it? would that be worth my EMPLOYMENT? we would be fired for taking surrendered* items, it's happened before and will continue to happen if any TSO is found stealing. that is uncalled for and I was raised better than to steal from people. in this economy, would i want to lose my job over that?

* i say surrendered, because TSA does not confiscate your items- you voluntarily surrender them. you are 100 percent free to keep your bottle of water, but you are not permitted into the sterile area of an airport with it.

Mr. Gel-pack said...

Michael @ "* i say surrendered, because TSA does not confiscate your items- you voluntarily surrender them. you are 100 percent free to keep your bottle of water, but you are not permitted into the sterile area of an airport with it."

I say confiscated, because when a TSO supervisor pulls the gel-pack out of the cooler with the breast milk, holds it over a trash can and tells you some bogus rule, and gives me the "option" of separating from my family for some undetermined time to check an additional $25 bag, and re-navigate TSA, it isn't an option. My "voluntary" choice is between a fine of the cost of the gel-pack (and chances of spoiled breast milk) or a fine of $25, separation from my family, and possible missed connections.

Does it make a mugging into a non-mugging if you give your victim a choice?

Anonymous said...

"He was simply referring to the abuse some of us are subjected to from passengers time to time. "

It's entirely deserved, since TSA abuses citizens 100% of the time. Shame on you.

Anonymous said...

Quote:
" Anonymous said...
My first year with TSA had a man who "forgot" to remove/takeoff his wedding ring before she walked throught the metal detector. He didn't think it would alarm the MD. Its kinda sad how many people don't know rings are metal.
Non-tso
March 9, 2009 2:11 PM"

Unless the ring is HUGE bling, it will NOT alarm a WTMD! We are constantly telling people NOT to remove their rings becuase more often than no they are either forgotten or the bucket they dropped them in at last minute gets jostled by the bag behind it and the ring bounces out and then we all have to scramble to find it!
Folks, DO NOT take off your wedding rings!!!
If for some strange reason you think it will alarm and feel that you MUST remove it, do it before you get to the checkpoint and place it in a secure pocket in your bag, NOT loose in a bin or dog bowl! (of course, this goes for all pocket items but people still refuse to prepare in advance and wait till they get to the xray line before removing all their stuff)

Anonymous said...

"(of course, this goes for all pocket items but people still refuse to prepare in advance and wait till they get to the xray line before removing all their stuff)"

Just so you know, I intentionally do this because it slows down the line and makes it harder for you to abuse citizens. I also stand at the end of the conveyor belt and put my shoes on and my bags back together, and make myself take up as much room as I possibly can to do so.

TSOKyle said...

Once last summer I found a bloody saw in a guys bag. His friend had a gallon of deer urine. We always get crazy stuff in the tourist seasons.

matt said...

Wow I am all about safety but I think the TSA may be getting "too safe" I mean what will a monkey head do?

Anonymous said...

TSO,Colson:

The thing is sad because we are doing our jobs it's up to the passnegers to understand what they can and cannot take abord a plane.

If you are flying please read the TSA webiste to understand the prohibited items list. I dont like taking away liquids from passengers but when they fail to take it back to the ticket counter

I gotta do what's neccessary. Anyone that's not a TSO understand what the bad guys are doing, trust us without TSA there would be a whole lot of bad things happening, and we are here to protect the public and do our job. Feel safe knowing your back is watched. I like making people feel safe when flying.

The world is a dangerous place.

I found a few things in checked baggage that was funny but nothing to write about.

Anonymous said...

RB states; "While we are all having fun with the odd things brought to airports I feel it is time to refocus on some real issues that TSA has created."

Yes having fun, thats what this blog was created for. If you want to talk about more serious issues then go to a blog that is directed in that way. Otherwise stop trying to ruin everyones fun because you don't like TSA. Would you continue to fly if there were no TSA?

Irish said...

Yet Another Anonymous soul asks:

"Would you continue to fly if there were no TSA?"


Yes. And a lot more frequently.

Irish

Tom Green said...

For the guy who tried to sneak 2 live piegons on a plane give him the death penalty. Maybe hes a terrorist...if you let two birds on a plane it could cause a crash or panic or heart attacks.If the guy was planning on releasing the live birds inside the plane while it was traveling. everyone including the pilots might panic or get distracted causing the plane to crash...Hopefully they lock up the gu who tried to sneak dirty live peigons on a plane for life. What a CREEP! 2 piegons of all things ugly birds that do nothing but fly around poop all the time and poop on your car too and you attempt to bring those nasty brids on a plane? Plz lock that guy up for life

Anonymous said...

I found frozen horse sperm on it's way to some lucky filly.

Anonymous said...

Besides live animals in x-ray (gross) - I've had gas masks come through checked baggage in a drop-and-go situation, where the gentleman told me he had them "just in case" something happened. I reminded him that he wouldn't be able to get to his checked bags while on the plane, and he kinda freaked and took them for his carryon. I thought that was odd.

DCATSO~Cyn~ said...

Hmmmm, I've worked for tsa for about 4 months now. So far I've seen.....

A hard-drive dismantled and stuffed with bullets

A crackpipe in a highlighter(seriously, no pun intended)

Pets on the xray(poor dogs)

An extra large homemade adult toy(I'm 5'3, and the toy was more than half my leg, I was mortified)

Had a man selected to go thru mmw, who got nervous and admitted to having weed in his socks before we scanned him

After the inauguration, we had more than enough leo's putting their ammo and guns thru the xray...-sigh-

Tisdel's Tirade said...

Michael @ "* i say surrendered, because TSA does not confiscate your items- you voluntarily surrender them. you are 100 percent free to keep your bottle of water, but you are not permitted into the sterile area of an airport with it."

"I say confiscated, because when a TSO supervisor pulls the gel-pack out of the cooler with the breast milk, holds it over a trash can and tells you some bogus rule, and gives me the "option" of separating from my family for some undetermined time to check an additional $25 bag, and re-navigate TSA, it isn't an option. My "voluntary" choice is between a fine of the cost of the gel-pack (and chances of spoiled breast milk) or a fine of $25, separation from my family, and possible missed connections.

Does it make a mugging into a non-mugging if you give your victim a choice?"

And this contradicts him how? You have the choice of paying $25 to check a different bag, losing the gel-pack or finding some other approved way to carry your things on board. Is it really that hard? You're making a huge deal out of a minor inconvenience. If you arrive early, like a sensible person, going out of line to check another bag won't make you miss your connection.

Oh, speaking as a random passenger-oddest thing I've seen was a woman with brown paper bags and a language barrier screaming at the TSA guy. Apparently she didn't understand that you can't take six bottles of Scotch through the machine.
Also, one fond(ish) memory of flying was when I went through an airport at around 10 AM on a Sunday, so everything was pretty empty and deserted... walked into the security area and about 40 bored TSA people focused immediately on me. I've never felt so suspicious in my life.

Anonymous said...

you want weird stuff try working in LAS (Las Vages) or ANC (Anchorage)
LAS - Cheating tools for the casinos always a fun bust!

ANC - A moose head in a cooler not stuffed but cut off that morning.

Anonymous said...

For the people who dislike TSA and the rules that are enforced - there are other means of transportation. The train, bus, boat, and your own car are great examples. Sure, flying is a lot faster and less time consuming, but obviously going through security is a bit of a stretch for some of you. It's amazing how many people complain about TSA and make them the "bad guy" because THEY are not prepared. The TSA are just doing their job, as they are told, and are hated automatically for doing so. How are you going to blame someone else for doing their job, when you're the one who caused the issue.

Anonymous said...

Complaining about a gel pack from breast milk. Correct me if I'm wrong, but do you think you should be subjecting an infant to a flight whose duration is long enough to require one to have refrigerated breast milk?

Anonymous said...

"Complaining about a gel pack from breast milk. Correct me if I'm wrong, but do you think you should be subjecting an infant to a flight whose duration is long enough to require one to have refrigerated breast milk?"

Refrigerated breast milk....well, what about moms who need to make a trip without the baby for a few days? It sickened me to learn that a friend pumped only to throw it away before coming home last year. I'm leaving for 5 days and want to know that my baby doesn't have to switch to formula just because I took a trip and threw away a stash of milk while away - it's liquid gold to moms and dads of breastfed babies! I've considered shipping it home to avoid having to discard my baby's only food source these days. My point: bringing breastmilk and cooler packs onboard is not a weird thing....it's a dedicated famiy thing. And people who cannot understand this concept are the ones who concern me the most when it comes to TSA screening. I only hope things are truly better now than they were a year ago.

Jeff said...

A suitcase full of cockroaches? Why?
Interesting post.

Justin Lewis said...

This is awesome. A frozen monkey head? Who would have thought of that!! ahahah. Makes me laugh every time.

Mr Funny said...

My funny story...

I was at the airport security and when my luggage went through the metal detector they saw a knife in my bag.
Obviously the officer stopped me and asked if i had a knife in my bag...and I said no, which at the time I honestly thought was the truth. (I forgot that it was the same bag I had used on a hiking trip a few months before)

The security then informed me that they were pretty sure there was a knife and searched my bag but didn't find it. They sent it back through the x-ray machine and again saw the knife!
They again searched again and couldn't find it. We repeated this process several times, each time I said I'm not sure what your are seeing but I am certain i don't have a knife ( I remind you again that i did have a knife but I had forgotten about it).

Finally after about 2o minutes the supervisor was called, who looked at the x-ray and then searched my bag and found nothing.

He said 'well I'm not sure why the x-ray shows a knife...but there doesn't seem to be one here.' he then apologized and let me go.

So of course I get to my destination and find the knife in the top flap pocket...

I nearly had a heart attack. I can laugh about it now, but at the time it wasn't funny.

Jill Moore said...

It is amazing what people will try to bring through, I guess some of them are just pushing their luck, with the drugs, but a chain saw!! what must they be thinking??

Charli said...

That's hilarious! Almost makes me want to work for customs...

Weird Pics said...

ROFL at Frozen monkey head... why would anyone even keep it... hahah really weird !!!

Anonymous said...

Okay. Talk about rediculous confiscations:

Last Thanksgiving, amongst the TSA's heightened paranoia, I packed my carry-on full of unwrapped Christmas presents to stow at my parents' house for a month. Although the items were probably not "typical", there was nothing extremely bizarre.

The only thing I had problems with was a 6" Craftsman brand bottle opener. The TSOs repeatedly scraped the bottle opener on every surface in the checkpoint area, trying very very hard to get it to make a scratch on something so that they could say it was dangerous. After 40 minutes of fully examining and DAMAGING my Christmas present to my dad, the TSO gave it back to me.

I should mention that the day before my flight I had called the TSA info line to make sure it was okay to take this in my luggage. The info line person assured me that since it wasn't an ACTUAL tool and had no sharp edges whatsoever, I should have no problem taking it through security.

More lies.

Thank goodness Craftsman has a good replacement policy.

What the TSA DID confiscate from me at the checkpoint were two small rolls of wrapping paper. What the heck?? How can purple penguin wrapping paper possibly pose a threat to aviation?

venison said...

I can't believe someone found deer urine!

Anonymous said...

Loved reading this post. Thanks TSA.

kieu choe said...

The only thing I had problems with was a 6" Craftsman brand bottle opener. The TSOs repeatedly scraped the bottle opener on every surface in the checkpoint area, trying very very hard to get it to make a scratch on something so that they could say it was dangerous. After 40 minutes of fully examining and DAMAGING my Christmas present to my dad, the TSO gave it back to me.

Gavin said...

We found someone with one of the best motorcycle helmets for motorcycle adventure touring. Where were they going to put it, in the overhead compartment?

glass coaster said...

its unbelievable what TSA find in peoples bags

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